## 2013/11/21

΂ɔэ݋~oV[@@xlfBNgEJo[ob

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1

## 2013/11/19

^[i[W̃~[WAEVbvŌĈȗԂẴEJ[h]AvɃVsꂽǁǍC̓AbvȂ܂܁AɊiƂɗ܂BivėĂꂽBAKg}[XIj

WJƂ͂ȐEEEE

g[Xgɂ̂ƂȐEEEE

Aށ{HĩF[XAYAMAYAɔĂ邻łB
v͒IɔoɍsĂd܂ċAė̂łATCg߂Č3000~ȏ㑗ŃICVbsOł邱Ƃ𔭌܂EEEE

2

## 2013/11/17

w[5:The game's afoot.@@Cabin Pressure

LrvbV[0104 Douz ̊zƃgrA܂BlIɁuHIvƂȂłA͂܂LrvbV[ƂĂ͏dvႠ܂B

ArڍăXRbgh̃NPbg[Ƀ_OXĂ܂u Then onwards for England, Harry and St George!@vXRbghl͊{IɃCOhlłu[CO܂Ba󒆂ɂȒPɏĂ܂A̓VFCNXsAGuw[5v̑䎌ŃNAct IIÎRڂ̌ł܂̒ɂ܂BtXRɓˌ̂ɕە䎌łˁBŁAڂ͂QsÓuThe game's afoot;v

V[bNEz[YT^Ar[ŁARiEhCpAz[Yg\ɋ񂾑䎌BuThe game is afoot. Not a word! Into your clothes and come!vBgameƂ͂̏ꍇA̑ΏۂƂȂ铮^ǋEU̓IAƂӖŎgĂ܂BR̃TCgɂƁulтBⓚpI@ւāAĂ܂IvƂɂȂĂāAz[Y̗Lȑ䎌Ȃ񂾂łˁB

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afoot͌Ìōł on foot ƌuāvƂ傫ȈӖ邻ł̂ŁA18Ĩz[Yafootƌ̂21ĨV[bNonƌ͎̂RȂ̂łˁHIŁAgamëӖA18Iɂ́ulv̂ł́uQ[vII

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1

## 2013/11/16

I have control@@Cabin Pressure

skids75̎ʐ^

LrvbV[0104 Douz ̊zƃgrAłB

a󂵂ĒJɑ䎌ǂނƁAƂقǂłȂ䎌Aŉ邱ƂĊyłBႦ΁AA[T[Douzɒă{{̃p_E[^[@āuTnɂ̓nCGíHvƌɂ܂A̓Kc}l[W[̐̂킩ĂƁAunCGiƂ͂̂Ƃ̂IvƃXi[̓jjłƂd|B

Ƙa󂵂Ȃʔ䎌A̓}[eB́uI have control.vłB
DouzɌŒɓÕ}[eBx咣AŌɃ_OXu.....you have control.vƏ܂Bał̓rOYX̃}[eB̎ʐ^̉B́uI have control.vuYou have control.v͑cl̃pCbgԂŒN̂mɂAlƂcȂ̖ڂ̑Oɂ鑀cɎ𓖂ĂĂĂ݂ɑ肪cĂ̂ƎvŁA̎NcĂȂƂԂAlƂɑcĂ܂ARs[^[̂ӂ̎󂯓n菇łBiWikiucvȂǂɏoĂ܂B܂AOɓ{ɂL^No̍qЃh}ŁÂ悤ȑ䎌ƃlbgŌ܂EEEHIj
ĒA_OXɈÂɁu@ƂČтĂ邩vƂ̂ꂽ}[eB́ANɂȂĐ悤ƃ}l[W[ƌA_OXɌ܂Bu just a matter of showing them who's in control. ^NcĂ邩BvɁu he's just one of those little men who've got a little job and so have to spend the whole time proving they're just as good as anyone else, you know the type.^͂܂ȂdĂ񂾂AɒN悭悤ƂĂ΂肢̏lԂ̂PႾB邾낻^CvBvƂ܂Ōă_OX̎΂܂ˁBuIt rings a faint bell.^sƂ悤ȋCBv

̌コɑzꂽāALɂƌƂꂽ}[eBRc䎌ɂuCarolyn! I'm dealing with this\it's under control! ^LIl̘b͂Ă@[@cȂ񂾁IvƏoė܂Bit's under control.͂ǂĂI have controlɌĉ䎌Ȃ̂ŁAcontrol̂ɑcƂӖ͂ȂǘaČĉ܂B{Ƃāub𑀏cv͕ςǁAɌŎ}[eBôŁB

̌AnCGiE}l[W[̂AL_OXĂяoāuǂHvƋlߊ̃_OX̑䎌ꂪ̂łˁBuBut don't you worry, Martin's in control.^łSz͖pA}[eBcBvEEEEƂ_OX͝X˂Ă܂ˁB

ł̃_OXƃ}[eB̌[h炱AŌɓlǂőcł́ADOUGLAS:u Do you want me to drive for a bit, darling?^Ɩlɉ^]ė~肷Hv@MARTIN:u No thanks, dear. @^₢񂾁A肪ƂBvC炢FD[hBLrvbV[̘a20Gs\[hėdarlingdearl̊ԂɌ킳ꂽ̂͂炢Ǝv܂EEERg[̌A͂Ċ@EoĒzFAiƂꎞƂĂjM̂킩܂B

2

## 2013/11/14

0104 Douz@@Cabin Pressure

C^[̃WEtBlÃj[XuLrvbV[Ō̃Gs\[hZurichNɘ^\肾vm̘̂͂a܂܃^CvĂłBƂ܂FbNĂȂ̂Ń~XƎv܂B^M܂ACIɃAbvĂ܂BԈႢAłĊ̂łЋĂIi͖{ji[AV[ĐQj

(bing bong!)

MARTIN: Good afternoon. This is your captain speaking. Just to say there is absolutely nothing to worry about.@ɂ́B@łBSz͉܂Ƃ\グĂ܂B

(bing bong!)

MARTIN: Hello. Captain Crieff here again. Still no need to panic. I repeat, there is no need to panic. Or to look out of the windows. Everything's fine.@ǂBĂуNt@łB܂ĂȂĂˁBJԂ܂AĂKv͂܂BOȂĂBłB

(bing bong!)

MARTIN: Actually, I wasn't being entirely straight with you just now. You see, it's this damnable sleeping sickness of mine. [Yawns.] Normally I control it with a mysterious stimulant from South America but blast it, my supply's run out. I'm afraid our only hope now is if by some chance someone on board knows how to prepare this stimulant and could\@@̂AɌ͑SRȂ񂾂ˁBقA̎킵ałA͂Aʂ͓̓ĎY̎hłȂƂĂ񂾂ǁAN\Ax͐؂ĂBȂcB̊]́AA@̒N̎h̓ȂĒmĂā[

CAROLYN: Yes, we get the message. Arthur, take Martin his coffee.@͂AbZ[W͓܂BA[T[A}[eBɃR[q[ĂāB

OPENING CREDITS: This week: Douz!

ARTHUR: Here you are, skipper! Wow, is that the Sahara?@͂ǂAXLbp[I킠AꂪTnH

DOUGLAS: The vast sandy thing on the ground? That's the chap, yes.@Lȍ̂̂̕ƁH@ꂪzACG[XB

ARTHUR: Wow. It's brilliant!@BuAgI

DOUGLAS: Always at hand with the mot juste, aren't you, Arthur? Yes, the Sahara Desert is brilliant, just as the Niagara Falls were brilliant, the Northern Lights were brilliant, and that chap from RyanAir burping the theme to the Muppets was really brilliant.@EEW[XgiGuK؂ȌtvƂӖjςƏoˁAA[T[H@ށATn̓uAgAiCAK̑I[uAgȂ悤ɁAăCAGÂ}ybcɃe[}Ȃ𐁂̂܂uAgB

ARTHUR: Come on, that was brilliant. Wow, camels! ĂA̓uAgB킨AN_I

DOUGLAS: And how would you describe them, in a word?@Ă͂ȂĕʂHЂƌŌȂH

ARTHUR: Brilliant! @uAgI

DOUGLAS: Thought so.@낤ˁB

ARTHUR: What are they all doing there?@ŉĂ̂ȁH

DOUGLAS: Filling up. Douz is the last town in Tunisia before the desert. It's like a big camel petrol station. @^ɂĂBhD[Y̓jWAōɓO̍Ō̒BN_̑傫K\X^h݂Ȃ̂B

MARTIN: [scoffs] What would you know about petrol stations?@ӂӂANK\X^h̉mĂāH

DOUGLAS: I've . . . seen them; I drive past them; sometimes I stop for a Kit-Kat.@Ƃ邵GԂŒʂALbgJbgɒ܂邱ƂB

ARTHUR: What, doesn't\doesn't your car need petrol, Douglas?@ȂɁAN̎Ԃ̓K\Ȃ́H_OXH

MARTIN: No, Douglas's car does not need petrol.@A_OX̎Ԃ̓K\vȂ񂾁B

ARTHUR: Wow. Well, maybe I should get one\@BAlɂ炢[

DOUGLAS: Yes, Arthur, you keep lumbering on after the uptake. It's sure to tire eventually. What Martin's getting at (and this isn't for your mother's ears) is: you know how we have to run off a couple of litres of fuel before every trip to check for water droplets? Well, there's nothing in the book to say where you have to run it off to. @AA[T[A킩̂ɂ܂bĂˁB̂ȁB}[eBĂ̂́iN̂ꂳɂ͓ǁjF̂AԑOɂ͂̉tH_̂ɔRQℓقǗȂႢȂ̂͒mĂ邾? AǂɗƂ̓}jAɂĂȂB

ARTHUR: Ah.@[B

MARTIN: I think there's a general understanding that they didn't mean "into the tank of the first officer's Lexus".@āucm̃OUX̃^NɁvƂӖł͂ȂƂ͕ՓIȗƎvǁB

DOUGLAS: Then they should have said so. I'm not a mind reader. Ȃ炻ƌĂ͂ȂBǐSp͂łȂB

ARTHUR: What, you can run a car on aviation fuel?@ȂɁAs@RŎԓ́H

DOUGLAS: Oh, yes! It's a bit like giving a bunny rabbit cheetah food, but it doesn't half make it go\as I imagine it would do the bunny rabbit.@I[ACGXIƓeɃ[^̉a悤Ȃ񂾂AĂ킯Ȃ@[@leɂ͂Ƒzقǂɂ́B

DOUZ ATC: Golf Tango India, good evening. You're cleared to land at your discretion on 2-7. Wind is 200 at 25.@StE^SECfBAA΂́B܂BQ|VIB200x25mbgB

DOUGLAS: Roger. Ooh, breezy.@BEE敗B

MARTIN: You still happy to take the landing, or shall I?@N̂ł̂HlH

DOUGLAS: Oh, I suspect I'll muddle through, Martin. I was doing my logbook the other day and I noticed that this happens to be my 2,000th landing.@AȂƂ؂蔲ƎvA}[eBB̑OqĂ񂾂ǁAꂪ2000ڂ̒ɂȂċCB

ARTHUR: Oh, wow! Is that true? That's amazing.@A킨I{HˁB

DOUGLAS: Oh. Not "brilliant"? I'm crushed.@[BuuAgvȂ́HւނȁB

MARTIN: No, it's not true, Arthur, it's just another transparent attempt to remind me what a mighty Sky God he is.@A{ł͂ȂAA[T[Â͂܂ɂȂđS\̋_낤ނ́AƖlɎvo悤ƂĂ񂾁B

DOUGLAS: Of course it's true! Why would you doubt it?@{̂ƂȁIȂ^H

MARTIN: Well, my suspicions were first aroused by the use of the phrase "I was doing my logbook". The last time you did your logbook, you could've had it signed off by Douglas Bader.@A܂uqĂvƂt[YˁBNŌɍq́A_OXEo[_[TCďI悤ȏՂ肾Bi_OXEo[_[G񎟐EŊ􂵂̃G[XEpCbgj

DOUGLAS: Don't listen to him, Arthur. Two thousand landings precisely.@ȂĂAA[T[B2000񂫂̒B

ARTHUR: Wow. And how many takeoffs?@킠Bŗ͉H

DOUGLAS: Oh, nothing like as many.@Aقǂɂ͑ȂB

ARTHUR: Right.@B

MARTIN: Mmm, because of course takeoffs are cancelled all the time; landings almost never.@[A͂悭LZɂȂ񂾂ˁG͂قƂǂȂȂǁB

DOUGLAS: That's right.@͂B

ARTHUR: Ah, yes. Of course. @AB񂾂ˁB

MARTIN:Oh, hang on, we've lost one of the hydro systems.@A҂ĂAVXeЂƂĂȂB

DOUGLAS: Mmm, possibly. The thing about Gertie though, bless her, is she is rather The Aeroplane Who Cries Wolf. I particularly enjoyed her last ground proximity warning\the one when we were on the ground. @ށABK[fB[̂ƂǁAzɁATƋԔs@Ȃ񂾁BɊŷ͂̑O̒nڋߌx񂾂@[@͂łɒĂB

MARTIN: The contents have fallen to zero. Stand by Pump 2 on, check pressure . . . Pressure's falling. No, we really have lost No. 1 hydraulic system!@cʂ̓[ɗĂBփ|vQXCbIA̓FbNEEE͂ĂB܂A{ɑPVXe̓_I

DOUGLAS: Oooh, what fun!@AyˁI

MARTIN: Right. Er, right, right. Erm, No. 1 hydraulic system lost. Uh . . . no special procedures! "Notes: lack of rudder will reduce max crosswind limit to 25 knots."@悵BƁA悵A悵B[[APVXeB[EEEʏu͂ȂIuFǂ̌ōő剡25mbgɒቺBv

DOUGLAS: Won't it just! Arthur, break the emergency glass! I require my Biggles hat.@͂ȂIA[T[AKXIl̃rOYXKvȁB

Biggles͉f{̃V[YłXqĂ܂
MARTIN: Douglas, this is serious!@_OXAkƂȂI

DOUGLAS: [beep] Douz tower, this is Golf Tango India, we've lost our No. 1 hydraulic system, no operational effects, we continue to make our approach.@hD[YǐAStE^SECfBAAPVXe𑹎Ảe͂ȂAڋ߂p܂B

DOUZ ATC: Roger that, Golf Tango India. We'll have the fire truck on standby.@AStE^SECfBABhԂҋ@܂B

DOUGLAS: You're quite the little ray of sunshine, aren't you, Tower? [beep] (bing-bong!) Hello Carolyn, this is the pointy end. Just to let you know I'll be landing today without No. 1 hydro.@NĂ܂̓ȂH^[H@n[ALAI_Bm点Ăǖl͑PȂŒ邩ˁB@

CAROLYN: WHAT? Why? @łāHǂāH

DOUGLAS: Oh, I don't know, just to see if I can. All right, everyone, hang on, we're going in!@[A킩ȂǁAł邩ǂ͂Ă݂ȂƁBA݂ȁA߂܂āAsI

MARTIN: I have control.@c͖lB

DOUGLAS: What?@ƁH

MARTIN: I have control. I have control! Control, I have it!@c͖lBc͖lICAlI

DOUGLAS: Martin, you gave me this sector, and I'm well within my limits\@}[eBAN͖lɂ̗̈n񂾁AĖl͈͓͂̔ł͗DGB

MARTIN: I know, I know, I'm sorry, but we can't be too careful.@mĂAmĂA߂AǂǂȂɐTdɂłTdĂƂ͂ȂB

DOUGLAS: Too careful? @TdH

MARTIN: [forcefully] I have control.@c͖lB

DOUGLAS: How do you mean, "too careful"?@uTdvĂȂ񂾁H

MARTIN: [firmly] Douglas. I have control.@_OXBc͖lȁB

DOUGLAS: . . . you have control. EEEc͔C܂B

MARTIN: . . . and shutdown checks complete. EEEđƒ~FbNBӁ[

DOUGLAS: Well done, Captain.@悭ł܂A@B

[Flight deck door opens.]

CAROLYN: Good lord, Douglas. You made a right old meal of that, didn't you? ܂A_OXBƐŌÕȗĂꂽȂ́H

DOUGLAS: Not really.@ׂɁB

CAROLYN: What? You did two go-arounds, then you finally slammed it onto the ground like you were trying to wipe out the dinosaurs. ȂłāH@Qx񂵂āAꂩɃhVƒnʂɍ~āBSł肩ƎvB

DOUGLAS: Oh, I'm not denying a right old meal was made of it, but I was not the chef du jour. Captain Crieff kindly took control.@AŐŌÕȐHł͔̂ے肵ȂA{̃VFt͖lȂBNt@cĂꂽB

CAROLYN: What? Martin landed it? With a hydro failure and a crosswind? Martin, you get flustered trying to parallel-park! Why on earth would you take control?@ȂłāH}[eB́Ȟ̏Ɖ̂ɁH}[eBAc񒓎Ԃ悤ƂĂӂ邠ȂÎȂ񂾂đc킯H

MARTIN: I'm the senior pilot on board, Carolyn.@l͏ʂ̃pCbgALB

CAROLYN: Yes, but Douglas is the better pilot on board. You do see how "better" trumps "senior", don't you?@Ał_OX̕ǃpCbgBuǂvuʂ́vɏƂ킩H

MARTIN: For your information, a firm landing is generally the safest.@Ql܂łǁAȂʓIɈԈSȂ񂾁B

CAROLYN: If that landing had been any safer it would've killed us. @̒ȏS玄B͎łˁB

DOUGLAS: You know what they say\a good landing's any landing you can walk away from. A great landing is one where they can re-use the plane.@Ȍ@[@qč~ȂǂȒłǂB̔s@ėpłȂ炻͑f炵B

ARTHUR: Mum, I was just taking a look outside and, um . . . the company who sub-contracted to us, are they called Panda Charters?@}}AƊOė񂾂ǁÁEElBɉ_񂵂ЂāAp_E[^[ẮH

CAROLYN: Yes, why?@AȂH

ARTHUR: And they're hiring us because they have a tech failure?@ŖlBق̂͋ZpIׂ邩H

CAROLYN: Yes, why?@AȂH

ARTHUR: Look over there. It looks like quite a big tech failure.@ĂBȂ傫ZpIׂ݂B

CAROLYN: Good lord.@܂B

DOUGLAS: That is a very broken plane.@ႠЂǂ{s@B

ARTHUR: Do they have hyenas in the Sahara?@nCGíHTnɁH

MARTIN: Not big enough to attack 737s, but I take your point.@737@PقǑ傫͂ȂǁAƂ͂킩B

CAROLYN: Well, let's turn this 'round as quickly as possible. I'll be back in an hour, and watch out for anyone trying to steal our engines.@ႠA܂ԂƂ܂AȂׂBPԂ߂邩AGW𓐂Ƃ悤Ȕyɂ͋CĂˁB

DOUGLAS: Have no fear! Martin will be in control throughout.@SzȂI}[eBnId؂ĂB

CAROLYN: Whew! ӂI

ARTHUR: Are you all right, mum?@vH}}B

CAROLYN: Gosh, it's hot!@AMI

DOUGLAS: Ah! Sahara not only brilliant, but hot! I see where Arthur gets his way with words.@ITn̓uAgȂȂAMIA[T[̌tIт͓ƂPȂƂˁB

MARTIN: So . . . they're officially the national cricket team?@ꂶEEE̐lBɃiViENPbgE[Ȃ́H

DOUGLAS: Apparently. Of Scotland.@̂悤BXRbgh́B

MARTIN: Didn't think Scots played cricket.@XRbghNPbgƂ͎vȂB

DOUGLAS: It seems at least eleven of them do.@ȂƂ̂PPl͂悤B

MARTIN: And the Scotland-Tunisia cricket match, is that a regular thing?@ŃNPbg̃XRbgh[jWAāAʂ̂́H

DOUGLAS: A hotly-contested Hiberno-African derby, I've no doubt.@MAChnƃAtJ̋ZA^ȂB

iJ̉j

MARTIN: What are you doing now, Arthur?@x͉ĂHA[T[H

ARTHUR: Oh, nothing! You two carry on. Act natural.@[AłIāBʂɂĂāB

DOUGLAS: Why are you taking our pictures?@ȂŖl̎ʐ^BĂH

ARTHUR: Mum's reprinting our company brochure, and she said I could have a go at taking the picture of the cover.@}}Ђ̃ptbgĔł񂾁AŖl\̎ʐ^BeĂāB

DOUGLAS: Oh dear, does that mean we're losing the current one?@Ȃ񂾂AႠŝ͂ȂȂĂƂH

MARTIN: The one with Carolyn strangling a customer? @̃Lq̎߂ĂH

DOUGLAS: I always thought that summed up MJN Air rather well.@l͂MJNGA܂v񂵂ĂƎvĂB

ARTHUR: She's adjusting his pillow! . . . But yeah, it does look a bit strangle-y.@}}͔ނ̖𒲐߂Ă񂾂IEEEłAAƎ߂ۂȁB

DOUGLAS: Hello? @n[H

HABIB: Hello, captain. Compliments of the airfield manager and would you please be able to settle the bill?@ɂ́A@Bs}l[W[炠ƁBƂx̕낵ł傤H

MARTIN: Yeah, actually I'm the captain. Hello, the one in the captain's seat wearing the captain's hat?@AƂŖl@Bɂ́A@̖Xqċ@̐Ȃɂ邱̖lB

HABIB: Sorry, captain. Compliments of the\@݂܂A@B[@

MARTIN: Yes, all right, give it here. [Flips pages] Yes, fine, fine . . . what's this?@͂AAɁB͂A悵A悵EEERȂ񂾁H

HABIB: Um . . . fire truck.@́EEEhԂłB

MARTIN: Yes, I can read what it says. What does it mean?@AĂ͓̂ǂ߂BǂӖȂ񂾁H

iJ̉j

DOUGLAS: Really, Arthur? The front page of MJN's brochure, our gallant captain quibbles over a bill?@́HA[T[HMJNptbg̕\́A̗E܂@ɌB

MARTIN: I'm not quibbling, Douglas, it says three hundred dollars here for a fire truck! @肶ȂA_OXAɏh300hďĂI

HABIB: I don't know, it's not usual.@킩܂A͂Ȃ̂ŁB

DOUGLAS: Oh really? [lowers voice] You know, Martin, these little airfields do rather try things on sometimes if they suspect you're not . . . @H@˂A}[eBAȔs͂ĂĂ݂񂾂AN̂Ƌ^āEEE

MARTIN: What? Not what?@Hl̉H

DOUGLAS: Oh . . . nothing.@EEȂłB

HABIB: Would you like to speak to the airfield manager, sir?@s}l[W[ɂɂȂ܂H

MARTIN: Yes, yes I would. I'll show him whether or not I'm . . . that. @A낤BlEEEǂĂ݂B

AIRFIELD MANAGER: Entrez! Ah, you have.@ǂIAĂB

MARTIN: Hello. Are you the airfield manager?@n[Bs}l[W[łH

MARTIN: No, actually I'm the\oh. Yes. Martin Crieff.@A͖l@[@B͂B}[eBENtłB

YVES JUTTEAU: I am delighted to meet you.@ڂɂĊłB

MARTIN: Are you French?@tXlłH

YVES JUTTEAU: Ah! My cover is blown. Originally, yes\you're not the only ones who used to have an empire, hein? Now, will you take café?@I΂܂BX́Ał@[@Ȃł͂ȂłˁA鍑̂Ă̂́BāAJtF݂܂H

MARTIN: No, I don't want coffee.@AR[q[͂B

YVES JUTTEAU: Oh, then café you shall not have. So, how can I help you?@AJtF݂͂ɂȂȂBł́AȂ̂pŁH

MARTIN: It's this bill.@̐B

YVES JUTTEAU: Yes?@͂H

MARTIN: Well, firstly you're charging us for three hours on stand\we've only been here, what, one hour fifty-four?@܂ARԕƑҋ@ɏĂ邪@[@lB͂܂AȂ񂾁APԂTSłH

YVES JUTTEAU: I regret we charge per hour. Or per part of per hour.@\Ȃł͎ԒPʂłB܂͊eԒPʂZ܂B

MARTIN: That's still only two hours.@ł܂QԂB

YVES JUTTEAU: You're expecting to leave within the next six minutes? You'd better, if I may attempt an idiom, get your skates on? [Chuckles] But yes, by all means, between friends, let us call it two.@ꂩUȓɏo̗\łH@nɒ킳Ă炦ȂAXP[gCi}ƂӖj񂶂HӂӂAłƂAFlłAQƂĂ܂傤B

MARTIN: Thank you. Now, this weather report. Eighty dollars?@܂ȂˁBł́A̓VC\񂾁B80hH

YVES JUTTEAU: Yes.@͂B

MARTIN: It's a very glossy folder\@₯ɍȃt@C[

YVES JUTTEAU: Thank you.@͂ǂB

MARTIN: \containing one sheet of A4 printed off from Google Weather Maps!@[g̓O[OVC}bvA4̎PȂI

YVES JUTTEAU: You would prefer two sheets?@Q̕悩łH

MARTIN: Which says it's going to be hot!@Ȃł傤ƏĂI

YVES JUTTEAU: It is going to be hot.@Ȃ܂B

MARTIN: D'you really think that's information worth eighty dollars?@̏񂪖{80hƎvĂ̂H

YVES JUTTEAU: Without it, you cannot take off! So . . . I would say so. Anything else?@ꂪȂẮAȂ͗ł܂IEEEƂłBɂ͉H

MARTIN: Yes, actually. Fire truck.@ށABhԁB

YVES JUTTEAU: Yes?@͂H

MARTIN: Well, what do you mean, "fire truck"?@AǂӖuhԁvƂ́H

YVES JUTTEAU: I can find no words that describe a fire truck better than "fire truck".@uhԁvȏɂ܂uhԁvʂ錾tm܂B

MARTIN: But why are we paying for it?@Ȃ̂H

YVES JUTTEAU: Because you called it up! You radioed you were landing with a hydraulics failure. We mobilized the fire truck.@ȂĂ񂾂łIȂ͖P@̏ŒƖ܂BB͏hԂ𓮈B

MARTIN: But we don't pay for that!@͕ȂI

YVES JUTTEAU: Then who pays for that?@ł͒N܂H

MARTIN: Nobody pays for that! It just happens!@NȂI͂܂ܗ񂾁I

YVES JUTTEAU: I don't know what your fire trucks do, Captain, but our fire trucks do not "just happen".@Ȃ̏hԂ͂ǂm܂񂪁A@AB̏hԂ́u܂ܗv肵܂B

MARTIN: Oh, I suppose you think I'll believe anything, do you?@AlłMƂłvĂ񂾂ȁH

YVES JUTTEAU: I'm sure you will believe almost nothing. However, if you pass me the bill, I will send you an amended one.@Ȃ͂قƂǐMȂłˁBȂA̐ɓn΁AĈ͂܂傤B

MARTIN: You're taking off the fire truck?@hԂ͂ȂȂȁH

YVES JUTTEAU: No, I'm taking off the third hour. The fire truck remains.@ARԖڂ͂Ƃ܂AhԂ͎c܂B

MARTIN: Right. Well, I've made my point, anyway.@킩B܂Aľ͒ʂAƂB

YVES JUTTEAU: You've made it. I have disagreed with it; I'm going to do nothing about it.@ʂ܂B͕s^łGɂĂ͉܂B

CAROLYN: Gentlemen! Gentlemen! I don't mind the singing, but if you could possibly all keep to the inside of the minibus, that would be super!@FlIFlÎ͌\ȂłAł~joX̒őĂƐ\܂I

RANDOM SCOT: On yer bike, hen!@񂽂̎]ԂɁARPbI

CAROLYN: Thank you! A very spirited bunch, aren't they? I was expecting the Scottish cricket team to have a certain dour quality.@\I܂CȌRc˂H@XRbgh̃NPbgE[͂ŋꂵ̂ƎvĂB

CAPT. JESSOP: Well, you can't blame them. They're just delighted to be getting home. We all are. Really, on behalf of my crew, I can't thank you enough. We are so, so grateful.@܂AڂɌĉBƂ֋AđтĂ邾łB܂߂āB{ɁA[\āAƂ炢BƂĂAƂĂł܂B

CAROLYN: Oh, [chuckles] thank you! Really, really there's no need.@A肪ƂIAȕKvȂł̂B

CAPT. JESSOP: Oh, but there is! We can't get over it\it's so public-spirited of you! So generous!@A܂I܂̋ł@[@ȂČŜ邨ł傤IƂĂŁI

CAROLYN: [slams on the brakes] What? How do you mean, "generous"? What's "generous"?@łāHuvĂǂӖHuvȂ́H

CAPT. JESSOP: Well, to come and rescue us like this.@₠AĂċ~Ă܂āB

CAROLYN: Well, it's my job, isn't it? I mean, I'm getting paid.@AꂪdȂłH܂AxłB

CAPT. JESSOP: Oh, really? Who by?@AłHNɁH

CAROLYN: What? By your firm, Panda Charters!@łāH̉ЂɂłAp_E[^[YI

CAPT. JESSOP: Er . . . no, I don't think so. I mean, they went bust, you know. You did know that, didn't you?@[EEEA͂ȂłBāA͔jYłˁBmłH

CAROLYN: No, I did not. They omitted to mention it.@AmȂBނ͌ĂȂB

CAPT. JESSOP: That's why we're here. The airport manager wouldn't let us leave without paying our bill. Oh incidentally, don't cross him, whatever you do\he's a right bastard.@łɂĂłB}l[W[xȂƏoȂłBƂŁAނɋtȂɌAāA@[@͂ƂłȂ}B

DOUGLAS: Ah, Martin. How did you get on?@A}[eBBǂH

MARTIN: Oh yes, pretty well. They're just sending out the new, amended, lower bill now.@A܂ˁAXBV蒼AႢz̐𑗂ėB

DOUGLAS: Gosh, well done.@ÂB

MARTIN: Oh, it's nothing really, just a matter of showing them who's in control. He's a nice enough fellow\really, he's just one of those little men who've got a little job and so have to spend the whole time proving they're just as good as anyone else, you know the type.@AʂɂȂłȂANcĂ邩B܂z@[@{A͂܂ȂdĂ񂾂AɒN悭悤ƂĂ΂肢̏lԂ̂PႾB邾낻^CvB

DOUGLAS: It rings a faint bell.@sƂ悤ȋCB

CAROLYN: Right! Come on then, let's get out of this hellhole! [camera click] ARTHUR WILL YOU PUT THAT DAMN THING AWAY BEFORE I MAKE YOU EAT IT!@āIƁA̒n𔲂oȂIiJjA[T[ẢՂǂɂȂƂHׂI

ARTHUR: Sorry, Mum.@߂A}}B

DOUGLAS: Everything tickety-boo, Carolyn?@ׂĂ܂ĂHLH

CAROLYN: No, it's not. We're doing this whole damn trip for free! Panda Charters went bust! That's why their plane looks like that! The airfield manager stripped it of parts in lieu of payment.@߂B܂ŗĂȂ̂Ip_E[^[͓|Y܂I炠̔s@͂ȂȂ̂Is}l[W[x̑Ƀp[cgݔ̂B

DOUGLAS: Goodness, that's hard-core.@ȂƁAn[hRAȁB

HABIB: Excuse me, Monsieur Jutteau's compliments, and the revised bill.@炵܂AbV[EWg[̂AAĉ߂ĐB

MARTIN: Right! [Flips pages] A-ha! Two hours! See, not so hard-core as all that, not when stood up to.@悵I͂͂IQԂIقAقǃn[hRAłȂA΁B

DOUGLAS: And the fire truck?@ŏhԂ́H

MARTIN: [quickly] Doesn't matter about the fire truck.@hԂ͂񂾁B

CAROLYN: What about the fire truck?@hԂǂH

MARTIN: Nothing! Doesn't matter. [To HABIB] Right, do you have a card reader, or . . .@ȂłI񂾁B悵AJ[h[_[͂HꂩEEE

DOUGLAS: Er, what's this? Safety infringement penalty: six hundred dollars?@[ÁHSᔽF600hH

MARTIN: Wha\What?!@ȁ@[@ȂɁHI

HABIB: Yes, er, the manager anticipated you might like to talk to him about that. He is on the radio.@͂AA}l[W[ɂĂ͂b̂ł͂ȂƈĂĂ܂BqĂ܂B

MARTIN: "Safety infringement"\what safety infringement?@uSᔽv@[@̈SᔽłH

YVES JUTTEAU: Ah! Good afternoon, Captain Crieff. I hope you are enjoying your free hour?@I悤ANt@IԂłĊyłł傤H

YVES JUTTEAU: Sadly, there was a small one.@cOłAȂƂB

MARTIN: What, it wasn't there on the last bill! @AO̐ɂ͂ȂI
@
YVES JUTTEAU: Indeed not. But when you did me the honour of visiting my office to complain about the last bill, you crossed the apron, did you not?@悤łB̃ItBXhɂO̐̋ɖK˂ĂꂽAGv؂܂ˁH

MARTIN: Yes.@͂B

YVES JUTTEAU: And were you wearing the regulation yellow reflective safety vest?@ĂȂ͋Kʂ̉Fː̈SxXg𒅂Ă܂H

MARTIN: I . . . @ĺEEE

YVES JUTTEAU: Voila.@قB

MARTIN: But it's a deserted airfield. In the middle of the day. In the Tunisian sunshine!@A͉ȂsꂾB̂ȂBjWȂz̉ŁI

YVES JUTTEAU: Nevertheless, it is wise to be in good habits.@͂łAǂKۂƂłB

MARTIN: Well, we're not paying for it.@A͕ȂB

YVES JUTTEAU: Ah! Then we have a problem.@Ił͎Bɂ͖肪܂B

MARTIN: Yes, we do.@ȁB

CAROLYN: No, we don't.@A܂B

MARTIN: Carolyn! I'm dealing with this\it's under control! @LIl̘b͂Ă@[@cȂ񂾁I

CAROLYN: Shut up, Martin. We're already thousands of pounds down on this trip; all I want to do is get home. Monsieur Jutteau, hello! So sorry about the misunderstanding. Yes, of course we'll pay the bill.@قA}[eBB̗ɂ͂łɉ|hẮGA肽̂BbV[EWg[A悤I܂Ă݂܂BA񂨎x܂B

YVES JUTTEAU: Well, if you'll just give your credit card to Habib there\@ł́AɂnruɃNWbgJ[hnĉ΁@[

MARTIN: Well, well done, m'sieu! It's a good week for you, isn't it? Bankrupted these guys, fleeced us\hope you feel really big now!@łˁAVEIyTł傤ˁH̐lBjYāA犪グAɃrbOȋCƂłˁI

YVES JUTTEAU: "These guys"? The gentlemen from Panda Charters? They are with you?@u̐lBvH@p_E[^[̐amB̂ƂłHꏏłH

MARTIN: Yes they are, poor sods, because you wrecked their business and pulled their plane to shreds\@AC̓łȓz炾AN̐lB̉ЂԂĔs@{ɂ񂾂ȁ@[

CAROLYN: Martin, that is enough!@}[eBAꂭ炢ɂāI

MARTIN: Hello? Are you listening to me?@HĂH

YVES JUTTEAU: I'm sorry, I was just . . . arranging something . . .@݂܂AƍEEE邱Ƃ̂ŁEEE

CAROLYN: Hello? The payment's gone through.@Hx͒ʂ܂B

YVES JUTTEAU: Ah, excellent. Thank you. Regrettably, though, as you are carrying Panda Charters's crew and passengers, I must hold you responsible for their debts. I'm afraid you may not leave until they are paid off.@Af炵B肪ƂB⊶Ȃ̂łAȂp_E[^[̏斱Əq悹܂AȂɔނ̕ӔCƂĂȂƂ܂B\Ȃ̎xςނ܂ł͏oł܂B

MARTIN: Oh now, come on! @x͂Ȃ񂾂I

CAROLYN: How much?@łH

YVES JUTTEAU: Twelve thousand three hundred and six dollars. But let us call it twelve thousand.@12,306hłBł12,000ɂƂ܂B

MARTIN: Yes, well, nice try, but that's entirely illegal.@͂A܂AĂǁA͑S̈@ˁB

YVES JUTTEAU: That's debatable.@ɂ͈٘_܂B

MARTIN: Unfortunately we don't have time to debate it, must be off now, see you in court. Maybe.@ɂƉXɂ͈٘_鎞Ԃ͂ȂBsȂƁB@ŉBԂˁB

YVES JUTTEAU: Of course, what is not debatable is whether it is illegal or not to take off without clearance from air traffic control. It definitely is.@A٘_Ȃ̂́Aǐ̋Ȃɗ̂@łȂƂłBmɈ@łB

MARTIN: Who's gonna stop us?@NlB~߂Č񂾁H

YVES JUTTEAU: No one is going to stop you. But when you get home, your national authorities (whom I would notify) would immediately suspend your operator's licence. [Suddenly there is the sound of trucks moving outside.] Also, I was playing for time. I am going to stop you. By parking the fire truck across your nose\although on the upside, this time I will not charge you for mobilizing it.@N~߂܂BA̋ŁAȂ̂̓ǂiʍłǂˁjɂȂ̉cƂƒɂł傤BāA͎Ԃł܂BȂ~߂܂BhԂȂ̖ڂ̑OɒԂ܂ˁ@[@ł߂Ă̋~́Ax͂̉^͐܂B

ARTHUR: Chaps, I was just taking a look outside, and\@݂ȁAƍOĂ݂A[

CAROLYN, MARTIN, DOUGLAS: Yes, we know.@킩ĂB

[In the passenger cabin.]

LACHLAN: Hey. [snaps fingers] Hey, pal!@[BȂAɂI

ARTHUR: Yes, sir? How can myself be of assistance to yourself?@͂Hp͂܂ł傤H

LACHLAN: When are we gettin' this thing moving? (RANDOM SCOT: Aye!)@͂񂾂H

ARTHUR: Ah. I do regret to inform yourselves that the delay that's going on currently is still currently ongoing. But we will keep you fully informed as to the developments of any developments as they develop.@@[AFlɂ͂̓x̒xꂪ݂sł܂Ƃ𐽂ɂlѐ\グ܂BP܂ǂȉP̉PłSĒꂲ񍐂܂B

LACHLAN: Eh?@H

CAPT. JESSOP: Well, how about breaking out the drinks trolley? @񂶂AݕT[rXłǂH

LACHLAN: [Chuckles] Heh, aye, nice one.@A񂾁A܂̂ȁB

ARTHUR: Unfortunately no drinks service is scheduled at this time due to technical difficulties. We do apologize for any inconvenience.@ɂƃhNT[rX͑̂ԋZp̖ɂ\肳Ă܂Bsւ܂Ƃlѐ\グ܂B

LACHLAN: What technical difficulties stop you givin' out drinks?@̋Zp̖ň߂˂񂾁H

ARTHUR: Mum's locked the cupboard.@}}˒IɌB

CAROLYN: [enters] All right, I've had a look. As well as the fire truck, he's put a tractor behind us and a baggage truck on each side.@ƂɂAėBhԂȂāAgN^[K[eB[̌ɁAוgbN𗼘eɂƂ߂ĂB

DOUGLAS: Okay, so we can't go backwards or sideways.@AƉɂ͍sȂȁB

MARTIN: Explain to me how we were planning to go sideways.@ǂĉɍsƂĂ̂񂾁B

DOUGLAS: All right then, Captain, I'll just sit back and watch you masterfully sort it out, shall I?@悭킩A@Al͂Ƌ@̂ݔqĂ炨H

CAROLYN: I don't have time for your stupid squabbles\this is serious.@oJȌ܂Ă鎞ԂȂ@[@[ȎԂȂ̂B

MARTIN: Yes. Yes, you're right. We can find a way out of this. The most important thing is to keep cool. [On cue, the air conditioning shuts down.] What was that?@BƂBEoȂẮBŏdv͉xێBiV[Ƃĵ́H

DOUGLAS: That was the air conditioning dying, Captain. But carry on\you were just telling us about the most important thing.@GAR؂ꂽłA@Błǂā@[@ԑ؂ȂƂbĂ܂B

MARTIN: But why? Why? I mean, why? Why?@ȂłHȂŁHAȂŁHȂŁH

DOUGLAS: Four excellent questions. And the answer to all four is: because we've run out of fuel.@S̑f炵łB̂S̋^SĂ̓́FR؂B

MARTIN: What? We can't have done! I mean, we'd just refueled!@Ȃ񂾂āHȂƂ邩I⋋΂肶ȂI

iquGAR͂ǂHv̋сj

CAROLYN: [switches radio on] Monsieur Jutteau?@bV[EWg[H

YVES JUTTEAU: Good afternoon.@悤B

CAROLYN: We seem to find ourselves a little light on fuel. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?@RyȂĂ悤Ɍ󂯂܂́B≽mł͂܂񂩂H

YVES JUTTEAU: Yes, we have retrieved our fuel from your aircraft in lieu of payment.@@Axɑւs@R͉܂B

CAROLYN: Monsieur. Without fuel our air conditioning unit will not work!@VEBRȂł̓GARȂłI

YVES JUTTEAU: Oh dear me. What an unintended consequence. May I suggest, then, that you work fast to resolve the situation? The temperature is currently 35 degrees\that's in the shade, not in a metal tube in direct sunlight. @͂܂B͂Ȃƕsӂ̎ԁB낵΁A߂ɎԂ̉ӂȂ邱ƂĂ܂B݂̋CRTx@[@AAłA˓̋[u̒ł͂܂B

MARTIN: All right. All right, Carolyn, I've been looking at the chart. There's an airstrip at Kebili only about 20 miles away. If we could just get as far as there we could refuel properly.@킩B킩ALAƒn}𒲂ׂĂ񂾁Bً}HPrɂāA20}C̋BɂsΔR⋋B

CAROLYN: Well that's great. Problem solved! All we need now is enough fuel to get there, our enemy to give us takeoff clearance, and for that fire truck to disappear. It's simple.@͌\ȂƂˁBꌏIȂ炠Ƃ͂܂ł̔RāAG񂪗āȀhԂȂȂ΂̂ˁBȒPB

iNPbg[ƃA[T[̐j

ARTHUR: (I'll tell them! O\Ow!) The passengers have a few requests.@q̃NGXgB

CAROLYN: What?@Ȃ́H

ARTHUR: Um, well, more beer. They were very clear about that. Look, to make sure I remember they wrote it on . . . me.@ÂˁAr[ƁB͊mBāAlKoĂ悤ɂď񂾂EEElɁB

MARTIN: Oh yes, so they did.@قƂAĂB

ARTHUR: Yeah. So beer, definitely; um, water, some of them are keen on; uh, and . . . an umpire.@Br[́A΂ˁGƁAA~llāG[ƂƁEEERЂƂB

MARTIN: An umpire?@RЂƂH

ARTHUR: Yes.@B

MARTIN: Why do they need an\@ȂłȂ̕K[

i{[̉j

ARTHUR: Ah, they started without.@[AȂŎn߂B

CAROLYN: All right!@킩I

ARTHUR: Mum! Mum, you can't go in there.@}}I}}AȂB

CAROLYN: Why not?@ȂȂ́H

ARTHUR: They're . . . they're in their swimming trunks.@ނEEEނ琅Ȃ񂾁B

CAROLYN: In their swimming trunks?@𒅂ĂH

ARTHUR: Yes, it's got really hot in there . . . and in here. I mean, it's just hot generally. I think it's because we're so near the Sahara Desert.@AȂāEEEˁBAǂ񂾂ˁBTnɂ߂炾Ǝv񂾁B

CAROLYN: Yes, all right. Very well. Martin, you and Do\where is Douglas, anyway?@A킩BˁB}[eBAȂƃ_EEE_OX͂ǂśAƂŁH

iq_OX"HOWZAT?"iNPbgpj ̐j

CAROLYN: (bing bong!) Douglas, I wish to have a little word. Under the wing. Now.@ir{[Ij_OXAb܂B̉ցBɁB

iqEEEIj

DOUGLAS: Carolyn, what can I do for you?@LAĂтłH

CAROLYN: What are we going to do?@Bǂ́H

DOUGLAS: I don't know. What are we going to do?@˂Bǂ̂B

CAROLYN: No, seriously, what are we going to do?@ȂɂA^ʖڂɁÁH

DOUGLAS: I really don't know.@{ɂ킩ȂB

CAROLYN: Of course you know!@Ȃ͒mĂł傤ɁI

DOUGLAS: You've slightly lost me.@Ă邱ƂƂ킩ȂȂǁB

CAROLYN: You always know! You've always got some sort of trick or loophole or knows someone who knows someone! What is it this time?@Ȃ͂mĂłIUƂAƂlāANmĂNƂI͉H

DOUGLAS: No, really, this time I'm stumped. But don't you worry, Martin's in control\I have no doubt he'll come up with something.@A{ɁA͍fĂȂBłSz͖pA}[eBc@[@ނv̂͋^ȂB

CAROLYN: I thought so. This is all because Martin took the landing off you, isn't it? So now you're not going to help?@ƎvB}[eBȂuĒȂ̂ˁH珕ȂĂƂˁH

DOUGLAS: Martin needs no help from the humble likes of I. Martin is\@}[eB͏ȂǗvȂBl̂悤Ȕڂ̂́B}[eB́EEE

CAROLYN: Oh stop it! Just stop it, will you? I need you to get us out of this. This is serious!@߂āAƂɂ߂ĂȂH甲ôɂȂKvȂ̂B{I

DOUGLAS: No it isn't! As it happens I don't even have the answer. I mean, the fire truck's easy enough, but not the rest of it. But in any case we both know that if you really want to get away, you can.@ȂƂȂI@ɂƂȂĂȂB₻́AhԂ͊ȒPB͂グBǂĂlBɂ͂킩Ă邶ȂBN{ɂǂɂ̂ȂłāB

CAROLYN: How?@ǂ́H

DOUGLAS: By swallowing your pride and paying the man!@vChݍł̒jɎxƂŁI

CAROLYN: What with?!@ŕāH

DOUGLAS: With a little tiny bit of all your money!@N̑SYق̒[oI

CAROLYN: I don't have any money!@͂ȂĂȂI

DOUGLAS: Oh, don't be ridiculous. I've seen your house, I've seen your car. I am currently standing underneath your aeroplane.@AoJ͂悵ĂBN̉ƁAN̎ԁBݖl̐͌N̔s@ĂB

CAROLYN: I had money. Eight years ago I had money after the divorce. More money than I knew what to do with. And as you say, an aeroplane. More aeroplane than I knew what to do with. But then I started to run an air charter business. Now I have three mortgages on the house! I have to keep the car because I have to have something smart to pick clients up in, and I have to keep the plane because\well, the minimum number of planes for a viable airline is one. But I don't have any money. Why do you think I'm always going on at you two for how much you spend\do you think I enjoy it? @͂BWNOɗɂ͂BǂĂ킩ȂقǁBĂʂAs@BǂĂ킩ȂBłŃ[^[qrWlXn߂B₠̉Ƃ̃[͂RIԂ͈ێȂĂ͂ȂBJbR̂ȂƂq̑}ɂ͂ˁBĔs@ێȂƁ@[@܂AqЂ̐\Ȕs@̍ŏ͂PBǂ͂Ȃ̂BȂBɂƃK~K~Ă͂ȂƎv́H@[@yĂƂłH

DOUGLAS: Well, yes.@܂AB

CAROLYN: Yes, well, all right, I do a bit. But also literally every trip we do has the potential to bankrupt the company, and this one could bankrupt me.@A܂AˁAˁBǌɖԓxɉЂ̓|Ỷ\ẮBč͎̂jY˂ȂB

DOUGLAS: Gosh. I had no idea.@ށBmȂȁB

CAROLYN: No. Well.@ł傤ˁB

DOUGLAS: But if you've been losing all this money, why have you kept on doing it all these years?@ǂȂɑvoĂ̂ȂÂƑẮH

CAROLYN: Because I am the Chief Executive Officer of MJN Air. It's a good thing to be. It's better than . . . [sighs] a little old lady.@͎MJNGA̍ōocӔC҂B̂BۂǁÁAEEEijVB

DOUGLAS: I see.@ȂقǁB

CAROLYN: So, will you please return to the aircraft, put on the rest of your clothes, sit down nicely with Martin, and think of something.@As@ɖ߂AƒāA}[eBƒǂāAlȂB

DOUGLAS: Right you are. @B

CAROLYN: Oh, and Douglas? Your solution to the fire truck? You're not thinking "set fire to the manager's office so it has to move", are you?@A_OXH@hԂ̉@ǁAu}l[W[̃ItBXɉ΂ċ삯vȂčlĂȂˁH

DOUGLAS: I wasn't, no, but I am now\you up for that?@ȂǁAłA͂ȁ@[@̋CȂH

CAROLYN: No!@߂I

MARTIN: Douglas, that's\that's a terrific idea! Would it work?@_OXAA[@ĂI܂ȁH

DOUGLAS: It worked when old G.W. and I did it with that snowplow in Vancouver, but I don't really see how it helps us, I'm afraid\we still won't have any fuel, and we still won't have clearance to take off. ܂sBÂG.W.ƂŃoN[o[̏Ԃɂ͂ˁBǐꂪǂȂ邩͂킩ȂȁA@܂RB݂̌ȂAĂ܂oȂ낤B

ARTHUR: Could we go and get fuel in jerry cans and bring it back here?@WFJŔR^ł܂ŎԂȂH

ARTHUR: We can't steal back the fuel he took off us.@ނɓꂽ̂܂lBݕԂȂȁB

DOUGLAS: I'm sure he's locked it away somewhere.@ǂɉBČĂɌ܂ĂB

MARTIN: Besides, it no longer meets the quality criteria.@ɁA̃NIeBȂȂĂB

DOUGLAS: Martin, that really doesn't matter. I think we can give ourselves licence to bend the rules just a tiny bit in this situation.@}[eBA͂ǂł񂾁B͂̏󋵂ɍ킹ċKق̏ς錠ɗ^ĂƎv񂾁B

MARTIN: [scoffs] Like you need an excuse! The man who hasn't bought a gallon of petrol since\oh. @͂͂́INɌ󂪕KvȂ悤ɂȁIK\PKƂƂ̂Ȃj@[@EEB

DOUGLAS: What?@H

MARTIN: Well, just a thought\if you could feed a rabbit on a tiny bit of cheetah food, can you feed a cheetah on lots of rabbit food?@̂AႦ΂ǁ@[@eɃ[^̃GTƂĂ̂ȂA[^ɓẽGTĂ̂ȁH

DOUGLAS: Oh! You mean\@I܂@[

MARTIN: What do you think?@ǂvH

DOUGLAS: Yes. I like it!@B񂶂ȂI

ARTHUR: Yeah. That might. Just. Work.@[B܂AAB

MARTIN: What might?@H

ARTHUR: I don't know. I just. Like. Talking like this.@BAˁBAbB

DOUGLAS: It's a great idea, Martin, but it'll only give us a couple of dozen litres at most. We couldn't even fly the 20 miles to Kebili on that, even if we had clearance.@vA}[eBAłꂾƂQ_[XℓȁBꂶ20}C̃PrɂōsȂȁBƂ~ĂB

ARTHUR: Could we just drive there?@܂Œn𑖂ȂȁH

MARTIN: No!@I

ARTHUR: . . . Sorry, Skipper.@EEE߂AXLbp[B

MARTIN: Sorry, Arthur, I know you're trying to help, but no, we can't just taxi our plane out onto the main road and drive it 20 miles to Kebili!@߂AA[T[AƂĂ̂͒mĂAł߂As@ŊHɏoĂ20}C^]ăJr܂ōsȂāI

DOUGLAS: Why can't we?@ȂŃ_H

MARTIN: What?@H

MARTIN: No, we couldn't! . . . Could we?@AłȂIEEEEȁH

DOUGLAS: Arthur! You know what you are? In a word?@A[T[I킩邩HЂƌłȂH

ARTHUR: Yeah.@[B

DOUGLAS: Brilliant.@uAgB

ARTHUR: Oh!@[I

iSXRbghENPbgE[̊j

DOUGLAS: All right, boys, Martin and I have done the sneaky bit, and I don't think anyone saw. Now, the less sneaky bit, which people will see. So it's all about speed\we get out, we do it, we get back in. Understand?@ANA}[eBƖlŃRb\ɏoANɂĂȂ͂Bx́AȃRb\ȂAXƂBXs[h̐S@[@OɏoAA߂ďIB킩邩H

THE SCOTS: Aye!@ACI

THE SCOTS: Aye! @ACI

DOUGLAS: Then onwards for England, Harry and St George!@ł͑OiICOhƁAn[ƁA쐹lZgEW[Ŵ߂ɁI
iFn[̓w[5̈́AVFCNXsÁuw5vtXRɌɌەThe game is afoot,ijc̑䎌̌ɂ̑䎌̂łj

THE SCOTS: Boo! @u[I

DOUGLAS: Sorry, sorry, sorry. For Scotland, cricket, and St . . . Wisden.@܂A܂A܂BXRbghƁANPbgƁAĎ쐹lEEEEBYf̂߂ɁI
iFEBYf̓NPbg̐Ƃ鏑j

iCG[[[[CIIIj

[The team + DOUGLAS and MARTIN pile out of the plane and rush to the trucks.]

DOUGLAS: Places, places! Okay, remember\bend from the knees and not from the back. And three, two, one, lift! [the sound of machinery creaking from the collective effort of the S.N.C.T.] . . . Yes! It's coming, it's coming! . . . Yes, and . . . Carry, carry . . . bit more, nearly there, nearly there . . . and drop! [Crash!] eɁIAYȁAGȂ񂾂AȂāBRAQAPAグIEEEEIAIEEEAāEEEAEEEƁAƁAƁEEEō~낹I

AIRPORT WORKER: Hey! Heeeeeeeey!@I[[I

DOUGLAS: Back on the plane, back on the plane! Go! Go! Go! Go!@s@ɖ߂As@IIIII

MARTIN: [out of breath] Engine bleeds on, auxiliary power off\@í[́[́[́[jGW@u[YAIA⏕p[AIt@[

DOUGLAS: Martin, we don't have time for the checks.@}[eBAFbN̎Ԃ͂ȂB

YVES JUTTEAU: [over the radio] Golf Tango India, what do you think you're doing?@StE^SECfBAAłH

DOUGLAS: Hello there, Douz tower. Sorry about this, love to stay but we've just remembered a pressing engagement.@₠ǂAhD[YǐBˁA؍݂Ǎ񑩂voB

YVES JUTTEAU: You cannot take off! You are forbidden from taking off!@ł܂I͋֎~łI

MARTIN: Duly noted. I'm afraid your little fire truck was slightly in our way. Hope you don't mind us moving it.@m܂B\Ȃǂ̏ȏhԂƎזɂȂĂ܂BĂCɂȂȂƂłB

YVES JUTTEAU: And how far do you think you'll get with no fuel?@ĔRȂłǂ܂ōsƎv̂łH

CAROLYN: [innocently] No fuel?@RȂH

MARTIN: Whatever gave you that idea?@ĂȂƍl񂾁H

CAROLYN: Wefve got fuel.@RȂ炠B

YVES JUTTEAU: How?@ǂāH

MARTIN: Let's just say next time you want to starve an aircraft of fuel don't surround it with four petrol-driven vehicles.@ɔs@QɂK\͎ԂSň͂ȂƂĂB

YVES JUTTEAU: You . . . you stole the petrol from my trucks?!@܂EEEgbNK\𓐂񂾁H

DOUGLAS: As the voice recorder in this flight deck will forever record for posterity: Absolutely not! . . . Wouldn't it have been clever if we had, though? ̑c̃{CXR[_[͌㐢܂ŉiɋL^FEEEƂłȂIłł猫ˁH

YVES JUTTEAU: It doesn't matter. You do not have clearance! Repeat, do not have clearance to take off!@@ȂƂ͂B܂IJԂ܂A͂܂I

DOUGLAS: Take off?@H

MARTIN: Who said anything about taking off?@N̂ƂȂČH

CAROLYN: Wouldn't dream of it! Against the law, you know.@ł肦ȂˁI@ł̂˂B

DOUGLAS: Plus we've nothing like enough fuel to get us there! . . . In the air. @ɏ[ȔRȂƂB

MARTIN: On the ground, though\@nȂʁ@[

CAROLYN: Taxiing down the long, straight, deserted highway to Kebili\@AyȁA܂ȁA̍Jr܂Ł@[

DOUGLAS: We should be fine!@vȂ͂I

MARTIN: Right hand down a bit, Number One! And be sure to indicate when joining the road.@E艺āAPԁIiCRRfBh}The Navy Larǩ蕶jēHɏo鎞ɂ͕\邱ƁB

DOUGLAS: Right hand down a bit it is, Captain! E͉łA͒I

YVES JUTTEAU: You CAN'T take that on the road! It's . . . it's against the law.@HɏoĂ͂ȂIEEE@łB

DOUGLAS: Is it? I'm not sure it is. What do you think, Carolyn?@łHǂȂBǂvHLB

CAROLYN: It might be. Not very well up on the Tunisian Highway Code.@ˁBjWA̍ɂ͂܂ڂȂǁB

DOUGLAS: Well, I'll tell you what, Yves old chum, if you can get the Sahara Desert traffic police mobilized in the next forty minutes or so, I suppose we'll find out. Bye-eee. [switches radio off]@ႠA悭āACyATnx@ʉۂ40ȓɓĂ̂ȂAƂĂ݂BoCB

MARTIN: Do they drive on the left, or the right in Tunisia?@Ԃ͍HƂEHjWAł́B

DOUGLAS: I think when they're driving on an empty highway through the desert in an aeroplane, they probably drive pretty much wherever the hell they like.@jWAlNȂ̐^񒆂̍s@ő鎞ɂ́AԂǂłDȏ𑖂񂶂ȂƎvB

iNPbg[̐ς̐j

DOUGLAS: Two miles to go, Martin.@2}CA}[eBB

MARTIN: Thank you, Douglas. @A_OXB

DOUGLAS: Do you want me to drive for a bit, darling?@Ɩlɉ^]ė~肷H

MARTIN: No thanks, dear. You know I get carsick in the passenger seat. Are they ready for us in Kebili?@₢񂾁A肪ƂBqȂƎԐ񂾂ˁBJr̕ł͏łĂ邩ȁH

DOUGLAS: They are.@łĂB

DOUGLAS and MARTIN: Arthur! @A[T[I

ARTHUR: [giddily] Today . . . has been the most fun . . . I have ever had . . . in my life!@́EEEPԊyEEE܂łłƁEEEėŁI

DOUGLAS: Good. Arthur, is it possible you've had a little drink?@BA[T[ANƈ񂾂肵ĂƁH

ARTHUR: I have had . . . a little drink. Oh, and look! I think I've found the photo for the brochure!@łEEE储ƁB[AāIptbgpɂʐ^I

DOUGLAS: Oh, yes? Let's see. . . . Ah. Martin?@AǂHāEEE[B}[eBH

MARTIN: Hmm, striking.@Ӂ[AȁB

DOUGLAS: So, Arthur. In your quest to find the one image which perfectly sums up MJN Air and everything it stands for, you've elected for a shot of twelve Scottish cricketers in the Sahara Desert wearing swimsuits and carrying a fire engine.@AA[T[BNTAMJNGAv񂵂đSĂ\ĂP̎ʐ^ƂđI񂾂̂́AXRbgh̃NPbg`[PQlTnŐpŏhԂ^ł}B

ARTHUR: Yes.@B

DOUGLAS: Hmm. The awful thing is, I sort of know what you mean.@Ӂ[[[ށB낵ƂɂȁAĖB

XNvgłB肪Ƃ܂B
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